My Long-Term Boyfriend Has Cystic Fibrosis, and I Have Conflict?
A question from Maura: My long-term boyfriend has Cystic Fibrosis, and i have conflict?
My long-term bue has Cystic Fibrosis, which causes him to have severe lung problems. Due to that medical issue, he cant travel- so guess who has to. I live a whopping 1,495 miles away from him- I live on a coast, he lives in tornado alley. 6 hours total flight time in an airplane at minimum. So now that you have the idea, lets continue. I am a senior in HS, and looking at colleges. I have no college fund, so when i found out that I got a scholarship for completely 100% free coverage for any state university, I was darn pleased with myself. But he wants me to go to college down there, so we can be together. the thing is though, I don’t know if I want to move down there and lose my health insurance, possibly to not even get a single scholarship! (I plan on going in for a sculpting major) So he cant move up here- he’ll die, thats a fact. But i don’t know if i could support myself down there. He gets extremely upset whenever i mention college up here. Id love to go down there, but I don’t want to incur a lot of debt. Not to mention I’m the one leaving my entire family, life, and my best friend behind. Any suggestions?
The top answer:
Answer by Ratty Fan
Isiah…dude, not the place for posting ads.
Anyway, in my opinion, if your boyfriend truly cared about you he wouldn’t be mad at you for doing the right thing for yourself. You should do what is right for YOU, which is to stay in state, and get college taken care of. If you two are meant to be together, your love will survive a few years of college. And it sounds very much like you’re doing most of the work in this relationship… does that sound fair to you?
Good luck, girl…do what is best for you! (He’s obviously doing what’s best for him!)
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Tagged with: boyfriend • conflict • cystic • fibrosis • longterm
Filed under: Cystic Fibrosis
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It sounds to me like he is clinging to you because he doesn’t want to be alone. But, frankly, you are just beginning your adult life that is full of choices. His, unfortunately, is limited by the CF.
Living with a CF patient is a big challenge. The routine needed to function takes up a lot of time and energy on the part of the CFer and sometimes the significant other. It is a challenging life at times. You have to fill in where the patient cannot. Case in point: my husband took care of our freezer this weekend because I’m having issues with my medications and have felt very weak/tired for the last week. He’s been helping more than usual because of my issues and he has been working alot of long hours the last week or so. This happens from time to time but as my illness progresses it will get worse.
As a mom, I frankly feel that your boyfriend simply has too many issues and that you, as young as you are, do not need to take this on with college on top. Moving would cost you way more than it will him and what if you figure out you can’t handle his situation full time? Then what? The scholarship will be lost. I agree with the other writer who answered….if your love is true and strong it will survive college.
Pick a state college near home and go learn to your heart’s content. If he trully loves you, he will understand and support you. If not, well, as the saying goes…There are other fish in the sea.